Thank You Sir, May I Have Another?

4-day Weekend, that is!
4 days of whateverthehellIwant. I like. Yes, indeed.
Let me recap the deliciousness of 4 days away from the office after quite possibly the most insane week ever. Hello, new boss...


So Friday: I slept for 14 hours. I passed out somewhere around 10 PM Thursday and awoke around noon. Perfect way to start the weekend. Of course our day started with some P90x. Ouch. It doesn't really ever get easier. You just kind of get better at it. Oh the pain. My ass looks rather amazing though, so I'll keep trying.

After our workout and our recovery drinks (that is seriously what they call them on P90x and that is seriously what they are. Srsly.) and our showers, Husband and I went to roam Target for hours, with no real purpose. Everyone knows you're not supposed to do this because everyone knows you'll spend hundreds of dollars on stupid things like zebra headbands, sippy cups shaped like crabs, and Grecian-inspired, dinosaur-esque sandals. (Yes, I have purchased all of these previously mentioned idiot items at Target at some point in my life and yes I use them all.) We came home with $200 worth of crap. I think the only think we really needed was shaving cream. The other $197 was spent on awesomeness such as a 1000-piece puzzle and the game Kerplunk. Do you remember that game?! The one with the sticks and the marbles and you have to pull the sticks out and not make the marbles fall?! Ha! We stayed up until 3 AM playing that, drinking wine, and building the outside edges of the puzzle. Turns out that Husband is apparently some kind of puzzle savant and can put pieces together amazingly well and I am apparently some kind of excellent puzzle-piece-scanner and can weed through those 1000 pieces to find the edge pieces and all other seemingly necessary pieces for whatever section we’re working on. (Why the hell did we pick a puzzle consisting mostly of sky and water?) I knew we got married for a reason - we each have special puzzle building talents! I literally fell asleep with a glass of wine in one hand and a puzzle piece in the other... on the dining room table - head buried in crease of arm. I'm sure Husband was proud. It shows my enthusiasm for... er? For team building exercises (??) and for...wine. I'm enthusiastic about wine. Don't judge me.

Saturday: Started off with some tanning bed and more P90x. Let me take this moment to appreciate those tanning bed workers that actually know what they are doing. And this might be mean, but somehow I just don't find that particular profession too mind boggling so when they actually screw up it IS mind boggling. Steps for running a tanning bed:
1. Type person's name into computer
2. Collect money, if necessary
3. Pick open bed to put person in
4. Push "start"
5. Clean bed after person is done
6. Repeat

Somehow I paid for an upgrade bed, but she tried to use one of my Ultra Dollars, but you can't use Ultra Dollars on the weekend (I knew that, she didn't... how that makes sense, I do not know), so I had to pay again but somehow that money went into my Ultra Dollars pool for my account and then finally I could tan. WTF? Seriously, I have no idea what happened. I furrowed my brow and grunted at her and I think my exact words were "I don't care what you really do, I just want to tan in bed #3." I think I gave her like $6 for a bed that was $3.50 and I ended up with $3 in my account. No.fucking.idea.

After that retarded fiasco, we saw Star Trek at the Hippodrome with the Sniders. WTF? Who names it that? Are there hippos there? Meh, "IMAX" worked just fine for me, but whatever.

We then went to the soccer game (Go Charleston Battery! Wooo! Go Season Tickets too! Woooo!), which happened to be the best game of the season! We scored 2 goals, got free ice cream tickets and the rain timed itself perfectly as the only downpour occurred during half-time. There was even a punch thrown on the field! First red card of the season - to those butthead NY Rhinos ::shaking fist:: Way entertaining. We went home and drank some more, played some more Kerplunk and played Last Word too and then played Mario Party. We had a Snider sleep over. Hoooray!

Sunday: We didn’t move. We didn’t bathe. We ate an entire dish of homemade mac & cheese and watched about 5 movies, one of which was Changeling and it was very very good. I recommend it for sure! We also did not drink for fear of killing our livers.

Monday: A spur of the moment invitation was given to us by Adrian & Julianne for some grillin’ & margaritas and... wait for it... SING STAR! Erin and Ryan (Jules’ sister, remember the pretty red head?) were there too. We drank and played Sing Star (do you really play Sing Star? We sang Sing Star??) and then a break out dance party happened in the kitchen and then we all decided that we should go home and go to bed.

You know you've had a good weekend when you have a break out dance party in the kitchen on a Monday night around 11:00 PM.

I like this Memorial Day/Weekend business. More please.

Let's Get Pierced! (Again!) (For the 11th Time!) (Seriously!)

Every couple of years I get another urge for a new piercing. I've been doing this for the past 10 years. When I was 16, I got a belly ring... sorry Mom. At 18 I attempted a tongue piercing, however the piercer effed up and I was left with a hole in my tongue instead of a piece of metal...sorry Mom. Around year 22, I opted for the tragus piercing and about a year later I followed up with a rook piercing. As history proved, it's been a few years and thus the piercing bug has come back to pay me a visit. But what the hell was I going to pierce? I'd run out of ear space and there was no way in hell anyone was piercing my downstairs. I'd always thought I could completely rock a nose ring... but at 26 years old? Could I get away with it? Was I too old? Would my co-workers declare me clinically insane and insist that I see a shrink for my quarter-life crisis? Then I remembered something: I'm Nicole. Fucking. (Cononie). I CAN rock a nose ring. And I WILL.

So, the evening of Saturday May 9th, Husband I went out for burgers and beers at Poe's on Sullivan's Island. Luckily, 3 Magic Hat beers came with that burger of mine. After a while, Husband was like "Come on, let's go."

"Where?"
"To get your nosed pierced."

"Holy shit. Okay!" And so we went to Piercing Perfection (cue angelic hums). I pictured a giant halo over the building with little pierced angels floating around. Okay, so it was more like just a boring brick square with a scraggly palm in front, but if they insist on perfection, then I'm willing to give them a try.

So we actually misread the site info and thought they were open until 9 - we were mistaken; they were only open until 8. Crap! I was totally going to lose my nerve if I had to drive all the way back the next day. So we started to turn around and a guy came out and asked us if we were, indeed, visiting Piercing Perfection to obtain a piercing. Why yes, yes we were. And he reopened the shop for us at 8:20. Sweet.

I signed my life away and took a seat in the yellow room. I happened to be wearing my beach-cover-up-turned-dress that night that was the same color. I was nearly camouflage in the most obnoxious yellow color there is. Only me. Hey, as I like to say and promote: Tacky is the new black.


I had to sit sideways so that Mr. Piercer could shove metal through my face. God, why do I sign up for this crap?! (It took us 3 tries to get the Sharpie dot in the perfect place, since after all, we were at Piercing Perfection.) I gripped onto the seat with both hands and squeezed my eyes shut. I wanted no part in actually viewing what he was going to stick in my face. First, he shoved a cork up my right nostril. It felt like it was about the size of a quarter. I was certain that he'd never be able to get it back out. Then he started with the "okay now take a deep breath."

Oh shit, here it comes.

"Okay take another deep breath."

Damnit! I thought he was going to pierce me on the first breath. Ugh, now I have to breath again. And then it happened. Metal.through.face. I involuntarily snotted and cried at the same time. Sorry Mr. Piercer. He wiggled that giant cork out of my nose and then asked if I was okay. I think my eyes were still squinted shut and I was still not breathing so his question cued me to view and breathe. The color then returned to my face. Oooh and now I have a shiny little sparkle on the side of my face. Preeeetty.

At first glance, I thought my piercing was giant. I was like "ohmygod, this stupid shiny dot takes up my whole nose. Bad decision. Very very bad." Then I stared at it for the rest of the weekend. Then I stared at it for the rest of the week. And now I love it. Excellent decision. Very very excellent.

I was right: I CAN rock a nose ring. And I AM.