Nothing Comforting or "Suite" Here

because i am such a good girlfriend, i went with dave to lexington, north carolina this past weekend so he could take an emt refresher course. i was there for moral support and entertainment. he booked a room at the comfort suites for like $93 a night. this would lead most people to believe you will be staying in a decent hotel. well, sike. this place was grunge city. we got there around midnight thursday night and we parked the car. of course we just happened to pick the parking spot right in front of the room with the half naked obese man standing in the doorway watching us while scratching his fat hairy belly. eww. wtf. dave's like "um, go to the room and i'll come back later." so we went up the stairs. luckily our "suite" was on an inside hallway. we have issues with doors that open straight to the outside. we're prissy, whatever.
so we get on our hallway, and it smells like indian people and clorox. we get to our room, open the door, and again are completely smacked in the face with that inviting scent. and it felt musky. grooooss. i seriously avoided touching the floor at all costs. i refused to sit on the comforter and would only sit on the sheets if i had to. the little table was dingy and there was no way in hell i was sitting my pretty ass on the couch. and i really do think they had a video camera above the shower in the bathroom. i was completed creeped out. then i got to sit there all day by myself friday while dave was in class. ugh. i had planned to go work out at the gym or lay by the pool, but you know, based on who we were greeted by thursday night...i chose life. i only got up to look out the peephole twice. you know, just to make sure or whatever.
i refused to sit in the room on saturday and since check out time was 11 and dave wouldn't be done until later than that, there was no way i was going to just hang out in the lobby or something by myself. no effing way. so i came to emt class and played tetris on dave's phone for about 5 hours. we got there at 8:30 and we had to sit there until 1:00 so everyone could do their little hands on tests. omg, people are dumb, by the way. i mean, the accents that these bitches had was unreal. hick as shit. and so annoying. kinda makes me worry that it will be these people who pick my ass up in the ambulance the day i crack my skull or something. not real comforting. kinda like the hotel... not comforting at all.
so dave got an a because he's smart and we finally got to leave skeezeville. yuck. so my advice to you is this: do not go to lexington, nc. all you will find is sketchy hotels, a duracell battery factory and a restaurant called biscuitville.

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